Article summary for Literature review(3)

Flax, J. 1978. The Conflict between Nurturance and Autonomy in Mother-Daughter Relationships and within Feminism. Feminist studies. 4(2), pp.171–189.

Central Argument: Flax posits that the psychological turmoil experienced in mother-daughter relationships arises from the systemic pressures of patriarchy, which dictate the roles and behaviors expected of women. These roles are primarily nurtured by mothers, who are themselves products and perpetuators of these patriarchal structures. This dynamic complicates the developmental stages of separation and individuation crucial for the daughter’s personal and psychological growth.

Key Point:

1. The preoedipal period:

   Flax emphasises the importance of the preoedipal period, which has historically been underestimated in Freudian psychoanalysis. She argues that this period is crucial to the formation of a girl's gender identity and self-concept, and that a girl's interactions with her mother largely contribute to the formation of this period. Flax criticised Freud's lack of attention to the preoedipal period and maternal influences, pointing out that his focus was primarily on the Oedipal complex and penis-envy theories, which do not adequately reflect the psychosexual development of women.

   
   

2. Mother-daughter relationship:

   The relationship is depicted as fraught with conflicts between the needs for nurturance and the desires for autonomy. Flax describes how the mother is typically the primary nurturer but also embodies the societal expectations and restrictions imposed by patriarchy, which can lead to ambivalent feelings towards autonomy in daughters.

   The mother-daughter relationship, according to Flax, involves a critical phase of "symbiosis" followed by "separation and individuation." These phases are crucial for the daughter's development of a personal and gender identity but are often complicated by societal and familial expectations.

   Besides, Flax also argues that under the influence of patriarchal norms that emphasise nurturing and self-sacrifice, the traditional roles played by mothers are often unwittingly passed on to their daughters. This inheritance can limit the development of daughters because they are ingrained with the belief that being a woman entails compromise and self-restraint. This notion often causes women to struggle with conflicting expectations of autonomy and caring for others, which can lead to conflict in their personal and professional lives.

   
   
   
   

3. Symbiosis and Separation:：

   Symbiosis: Symbiosis is the stage of close bonding between infant and mother, a stage that is crucial to establishing the infant's initial sense of security and emotional well-being. According to Flax, in the patriarchal context, the mother, who tends to embody and internalise societal expectations of nurturing and self-sacrifice, is ambivalent about her autonomy, and is then either too close to her daughter or emotionally distant from her. Daughters in overly symbiotic relationships may struggle to develop an independent identity, leading to dependency and a lack of personal autonomy. This may manifest itself in adulthood as difficulty asserting independence and maintaining dependency while constantly seeking external validation. Conversely, daughters with emotionally distant relationships often experience feelings of exclusion and dissatisfaction due to their mother's lack of emotional support. This can lead to feelings of alienation or avoidance in their relationships as they learn to suppress their emotional needs to accommodate their mother's unavailability. In addition, these early interactions can cause women to replicate similar dynamics in their adult relationships, especially with the same sex, which may lead to conflict between women.

   
   

   Separation and Independence: Flax explores the two stages of separation and symbiosis as interacting with each other, she points out that successfully navigating through the symbiosis stage is the basis of effective separation. Separation refers to the process by which an individual develops a sense of self that is distinct from others (especially the primary caregiver, usually the mother). Individuation is closely related to detachment, but focuses more on the development of personal identity, including the formation of one's own values, interests and behaviours independent of maternal influence or social expectations.Flax discusses that in patriarchal contexts, mothers could unconsciously impede their daughters' individuation and separation processes by instilling in them a deep sense of having to conform to traditional parenting and self-sacrificing roles. This hindrance may be due to mothers' own unmet need for autonomy, as well as their internalisation of patriarchal values, which they pass on to their daughters. At the same time, Flax argues that these fraught processes of separation and individuation can lead to internal and external conflicts among women. Daughters may struggle to reconcile their need for autonomy with their expected caring role as they receive mixed messages of success and independence. This internal conflict is reflected in wider society, where women often find themselves competing with each other rather than forming networks of mutual support, further perpetuating patriarchal divisions.

   
   
   
   
   
   

4. Feminism :

   She emphasises that women have historically been confined to roles that emphasise nurturing and self-sacrifice, and while these roles are ostensibly celebrated, they are undervalued in terms of power dynamics and social recognition. At the same time, these roles have often stifled women's quest for autonomy, manifesting in suppressed ambitions for career, personal independence, and public influence.

   
   

   Flax advocated for a transformative feminist approach that seeks to heal the rift between traditional expectations and women's aspirations, and to create environments in which women can thrive as whole human beings.